Tidbits
by Lady Dudley
Summary: Collection of episode additions in the form of drabbles/one-shots giving a Paric spin to Season 5. Listed as 'complete' but hopefully with more to follow.
1. Steep

**A/N: So, I feel I have been remiss in my story posting lately. Especially in light of the events of Season 5. This is just a little something that I will (hopefully) keep adding to as the season progresses. It's basically a collection of episode add-ons that give my Paric spin/version to various goings on. At this stage they are all Eric's P.O.V. but that may change.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.  
**

**_Tidbits:  
_Steep  
**

"_You gave yourself to _me_, completely_._"_

This time the tone was accusing, not half-mocking; this time it was Pam who said them, not Sookie.

Pam, the only person in world who could say that and know it was absolutely true.

Only she hadn't said it; he was dreaming.

Again.

Ever since Nora had informed him and Bill that they could never go back, that they had to cut all ties with their previous existence, he'd been plagued by thoughts of Pam.

Thoughts that he'd tried desperately to ignore: if he could leave Sookie without a backwards glance then he should be able to leave Pam as well.

At least, that was what he had been telling himself.

He'd even f*cked Nora in an effort to prove to himself how little he cared about anything or anyone _and_ he had enjoyed it.

Until thoughts of Pam had invaded his mind once more and he'd felt like somehow he'd betrayed her.

Again.

After everything they had been through, she deserved more than how he had treated her. She deserved better than him disappearing on her without a word, with yet another woman no less.

Hell, she'd probably think it was her fault and he wasn't sure that he could live with that.

_His_ choices and actions had all led up to this moment, if anything Pam had tried to prevent this from happening. She probably would have succeeded too, if he hadn't momentarily lost his mind outside the Moon Goddess Emporium.

He had regretted the words the moment he'd spoken, but he thought he had all the time in the world to make it better.

Over a thousand years of existence had made him cocky, reckless even and now it would cost him his identity.

Now it would cost him Pam.

And, for the first time, he found the cost of his actions too steep.


	2. Same

**A/N: S5E2&3  
**

**_Tidbits:  
_Same**

Eric regarded the cell with mild interest; at least he was still alive, that was something.

He wondered how Pam was faring; he had blocked their bond, but he could still dimly feel her pain and a touch of desperation.

He hoped that neither emotion was connected to him, but he knew her better than that.

He'd only seen desperation on her face once before, a long time ago when she had slit her wrists and looked at him with those wide sorrowful eyes.

"_Let me walk the world with you, Mr. Northman, or watch me die."_

That moment had been one of the most important of his life.

He could have saved her life and then glamoured her, but somehow the thought of her being alive in the world and having no knowledge of his existence had irked him.

Mostly because he knew he wouldn't be able to leave her; she fascinated him and he couldn't give her up so easily.

Instead he would have returned to her day after day, year after year until the end.

It was then he'd realised that, unless he turned her, he would have to watch her die eventually because he'd be damned if he'd let her die alone.

He could never have allowed that.

Not his Pamela.

And she had been his, even then.

So he had done the only thing he could do: he'd changed her.

Now he wondered whether it had been pure arrogance on his part to assume she would be the one to die first. Oh, he'd always done his best to protect her – in truth, he could never do otherwise – but he'd never thought _he_ would be what she needed protecting from.

He was most likely going to meet the True Death and he knew it would break her.

He knew it with both complete certainty and without any conceit, because he would be the same should anything happen to her.


	3. Safe

**A/N: S5E4 - there was so much going on in this episode E/P-wise that I have split it into two chapters.  
**

**_Tidbits:  
_Safe**

"She knows nothing."

Eric was vaguely aware that his assurances did little to convince Bill but he wasn't too concerned.

What concerned him was how true that statement was: if Pam truly believed that he did not trust her, that he didn't care for her…than she really _did_ know nothing.

Admittedly he had done little in the past few days to contradict such a belief, but he had not been himself and he certainly had not meant for things to get so far out of hand so quickly.

She was his whole world; he may have lost sight of that for a little while but that had never meant that it wasn't true.

Now she wanted to be released.

She had said as much only moments before…or had she merely wanted him to fight harder for her?

He couldn't tell anymore, but he had to keep her safe.

His heart sank.

He would have to let her go.

She would die for him a thousand times over if he asked her to and he couldn't let her do that.

He would not survive her death, of that he was certain.

No. He would have to release her, but not tonight.

Not when she was so angry with him.

Besides, he would need time to prepare: he wasn't even sure he'd have the strength to do it.

But it had to be done, her safety must come first.

Just like it always had.


	4. Severed

**A/N: S5E4 pt. 2  
**

**_Tidbits:  
_Severed**

It was done.

He had released her.

Even as he clutched his weeping child closer he could barely wrap his mind around that concept. He couldn't believe that he had done it.

In fact, he had almost lost his nerve but he had convinced himself he had no choice. By her own admission she would follow him to the True Death and he would not – _could_ not – allow that.

But that did not mean that he had not felt an almost overwhelming sense of loss the moment he spoke the words and something tangible between them had snapped.

It did not mean that his heart hadn't broken when she had all but collapsed into his arms.

He buried his face in her hair as he tried desperately to bury just how much this turn of events had affected him. He could not afford to lose his focus, not when their lives depended on the success of his mission.

Her tears ripped through him and he found himself barely able to contain his own.

She hadn't even objected, which had somehow hurt him more than if she had protested. At that crucial moment in their shared existence she had accepted his decision without protest, proving once again the depths of her devotion.

And he knew he did not deserve it.

That he did not deserve _her_.

He promised himself that, if he lived through this, he would somehow make it up to her.

_If_ he lived through it and he realised now what a big 'if' that was. This could very well be the last time he would ever see her, the last time he would hold her in his arms.

That thought proved to be his undoing and a lone tear trickled down his cheek; others followed in swift succession as his tenuous control over his emotions finally gave way.


	5. Sickened

**A/N: S5E4 pt. 3: I decided that this episode called for just a little bit more. My apologies if you don't share my interpretation of this scene, but this is a (strictly) Paric story and therefore may venture into the realms of AU as the season progresses. **

******_Tidbits:  
_Sickened**

Eric's foul mood at being prematurely called away from Pam only intensified as he came to join Bill outside Sookie's window.

As he watched her with Alcide he couldn't decide whether he was more hurt or disgusted by her actions.

Both he and Bill had put their necks on the line for her and, from what Bill had told him, Pam had turned Tara at her request. Now it appeared that she was either unconcerned by all this or was wallowing in self-pity, as the numerous bottles on the table would seem to suggest.

Either way it wasn't winning her any brownie points in his mind.

He glanced at Bill and noted the expression on the other vampire's face, if his expression was anything to go by Bill wasn't feeling anything except hurt by this turn of events.

"Awkward time for a drop in, Bill," he commented drily, turning his attention back to the window.

"Jessica mentioned Sookie had been having a rough go of it," Bill replied.

Eric quirked an eyebrow, "She seems to be recovering nicely. Can we go back to looking for Russell now?" he added as Bill made no sign of leaving.

"We are looking for Russell," Bill stated, "clearly without any success. Sookie could be useful."

Eric resisted the urge to roll his eyes, "I don't think she wants anything to do with us again," he reminded Bill, not sure whether he wanted anything to do with her either.

She had damaged his relationship with Pam and, by extension, led her release. He wasn't sure he could forgive her for that.

He was interrupted from his musings by Bill, "I don't think we give her the choice."

Eric resisted the urge to say something about Bill's inability to let go and merely motioned him forward.

"After you."


	6. Suspicion

**A/N: S5E5: I apologise for the delay in posting these, real life got in the way and I was interested to see what would happen in E6 before I wrote anything else.  
**

******_Tidbits:  
_Suspicion**

Eric meant what he said to Bill, it was absurd to think that Nora had betrayed them.

Betrayed _him_.

Yet he couldn't deny that Bill's words had given him pause; that the more he thought about it the less absurd the idea had become.

She had never truly forgiven him for turning Pam; it had been the two of them – three if you counted Godric – for so long that she had deeply resented his adding another to their little group.

Now one of the direct consequences of Russell being liberated was his releasing Pam.

Even he couldn't write that off as a coincidence.

Hell had no fury like a woman scorned, but he couldn't believe that she would have gone to such an extent just to separate him from his progeny.

No.

The whole idea was absurd.

In any case, his ego wasn't _quite_ big enough to entertain the thought of Nora doing all this solely to revenge herself on him.

But even if he could dismiss Pam being her motivation he couldn't completely dismiss the idea of her betraying him.

Betraying them all.

Besides if he could believe his Pam capable of such an act, then why not Nora?

He could only hope that Nora would prove her loyalty as Pam had done.


	7. Sanguine

**A/N: S5E6: This chapter is a bit short, but there are two updates for this episode. Hope that makes up for it :)  
**

******_Tidbits:  
_Sanguine**

"_But not impossible_."

Those were the words that truly changed Eric's mind.

Not the makeshift stake Bill held against his back, not Bill's warning not to make his decisions for him and certainly not any desire to bring Russell to justice.

No.

What changed his mind was the small grain of hope that Bill's words planted into his mind of getting out this mess.

Unbidden an image of Pam's face when he had broken their bond sprang to his mind.

Bill was right; bringing back Russell was the only way that they might free themselves from this mess.

And once he was free of the Authority, and everything associated with it, he could return to Fangtasia; return to Pam.

The thought of reclaiming what was his and of life returning to some semblance of normal was what made him finally back down.

Of course, as seemed to happen so often lately, his hope was short lived as Kibwe and a contingent of the Authority guards entered the room.

But for once in his life, Eric decided to remain optimistic and it wasn't until Salome informed him that Nora was a Sanguinist that his hope finally died.


	8. InSanity

**A/N: S5E6 p2.  
**

******_Tidbits:  
_(In)Sanity  
**

It was official.

His sister was either completely insane or a traitor.

Or both.

Although he couldn't quite figure out whether what she was betraying was the Authority, him or herself?

Personally he didn't care for the Authority or any of the crap Roman had been spouting only minutes before but he did care about Nora's mental state and about what she might have done.

Not to mention how it would affect him and others that he cared about.

He listened with half an ear to Nora's babblings as what Salome said sank in or, rather, how she had _said_ it.

Eric swore under his breath.

She was in on it.

He rushed from Nora's cell and into the Authority's meeting room.

Something was about to happen and he had a pretty good idea he knew what that something was.

He skidded to a halt, joining the other vampires who stood frozen in place as Russell staked Roman.

Although he had not particularly cared for the other vampire, this was _not_ good development.

Religion aside: the shit had just squarely hit the fan.


	9. Saviour

**A/N: I heartily apologise for my lack of updates for this story. Real life intervened and I was left shamefully behind in my _True Blood_ viewing, but I have since caught up and have finished writing the rest of this story. Thank you to those who have read and reviewed this, I'm glad you have enjoyed it so far and I hope that I don't disappoint anyone! :)  
This chapter is based on S5E7&8**

******_Tidbits:  
_Saviour**

Eric walked down the street, leaning heavily on his companion and feeling a strange sense of freedom.

Whatever had been in that blood certainly was liberating: everything seemed more distinct and alive.

He ran a hand through his companion's hair, marvelling at the texture, only to find himself momentarily confused.

Her hair was so dark; so unlike the long, luxurious blonde tresses he was accustomed to running his hands through. It smelt different too, yet oddly familiar.

He started a little as he recognised Nora as his companion, rather than Pam as he had been expecting.

For a brief moment he wondered where she was, saddened by the thought that she wasn't there to share this experience with him.

His thoughts of Pam were interrupted as a car suddenly blocked his path, causing him to react with more anger than was warranted.

However, thoughts of Pam lingered intermittently throughout the evening and Eric found himself wondering what she would make of what was happening around him.

He dimly remembered some of his own misgivings following Roman's murder and Salome's declaration and found himself wondering if she would approve,

It is as this ghost of a thought flittered through his mind that Godric appeared to him.

If Pam's disapproval would give him pause, the disapproval of his Maker was enough to make him sick to the stomach.

Suddenly the evening no longer held any enjoyment for him; even Lilith's appearance seemed wrong somehow, making Nora's elation even harder to bear.

However, as they returned to the Authority Headquarters, Eric realised that he may have more than Nora to worry about.

Bill seemed to have fallen for the religious claptrap hook, line and sinker.

His last thought as he went to ground that evening was how amused Pam would be at his being suddenly thrust into the role of saviour.


	10. Scepticism

**A/N: S5E9 with some elements of S5E10.**

******_Tidbits:  
_Scepticism**

It was time for a new plan, Eric decided as he paced the room angrily.

He wasn't going to save Bill; he was going to kill him.

Or at the very least wipe that irritating self-righteous expression off his face.

Eric clenched and unclenched his fists, King Bill had been bad enough but Chancellor Compton was _infinitely_ worse.

He still couldn't believe that Bill had betrayed him; it was true that they had never gotten along but he'd never thought Bill would sell him out so completely.

He certainly hadn't thought he would condone the murder – Eric would accept no other term for it – of Molly. He'd liked the younger vampire and had promised himself to protect her once they got out.

Now she was just someone else to add to the list of people he'd let down in the last few days.

He stopped in the middle of the room and forced himself to calm down.

Perhaps he was overreacting; maybe there was still a chance – however slim it may be – to save Nora…and Bill.

As much as he hated to admit it, he wouldn't be able to forgive himself if he left Bill to be destroyed by these people and their beliefs.

Although, at the moment, he seriously doubted Bill deserved it.


	11. Sister

**A/N: S5E10 with elements form S5E9.**

******_Tidbits:  
_Sister**

"_You're not the power hungry bitch I used to love."_

At the time he hadn't given much thought to his choice of words, it was only later that he realised he'd used the past tense to describe his feelings for her.

It was meant to be teasing, a passing comment about how she had changed.

In the wake of Godric's death at the hands of Lilith, however, he realised that he'd meant exactly what he had said.

He _had_ loved her once; she had been his sister and his lover for centuries – until Pam.

Pam had changed everything; she was more than his child, she was his equal from the moment they met. Something that Nora had never understood, or liked.

As he knelt at Russell's feet, pledging his allegiance to Lilith and renouncing his vendetta against him, Eric reflected on how much he had been forced to give up because of his sister. How deeply she had betrayed him – and Godric – by her actions.

No, he did not love her any more, at least not in any romantic sense. She was still his sister and he would still do everything in his power to protect her, but no longer at the expense of everything he held dear.

He was no longer playing nice in order to get out safely with Bill and Nora; he was playing to get back to Pam.

Saving Nora and Bill was now little more than an added bonus.


	12. Secession

**A/N: S5E11&12.**

******_Tidbits:  
_Secession**

For the first time in what seemed like forever, things were starting to go Eric's way: he and Nora had successfully escaped from the Authority's clutches (with the added bonus of Nora being a willing participant this time) and he'd killed Russell.

Now he was almost giddy as he anticipated the moment when he would see Pam again.

He listened distractedly as he entered the bar with Nora, feeling almost relieved that the bar was empty. It was bad enough having Nora and Tara around to witness his reunion with Pam, let alone having a bar full of patrons.

When Pam failed to appear, Eric began to get a very bad feeling about why the bar was empty. A feeling that was confirmed as Tara stepped into the room and with three words shattered what remained of his previous serenity.

The hours between discovering Pam had been taken and returning to the Authority Headquarters seemed to be designed solely for the purpose of torturing him.

Firstly, he had to deal with Nora questioning his need to protect his child and her insinuations that she wasn't worth saving. Simultaneously lowering herself in his esteem and elevating Tara for their respective responses to the capture of his child.

Although both owed their continued existence to Pam: Nora because he didn't have the time to tear her apart over her insinuations (although the thought had crossed his mind) and Tara because he only tolerated her insubordination because she was Pam's.

However much he cited 'family' that evening, it was Pam he really cared about.

Secondly, there was Sookie and her brother (who had apparently decided to start channelling Rambo) to deal with. He did not like admitting that he needed help, least of all where protecting Pam was concerned, but he knew he couldn't save her on his own.

Jason's stubborn refusal and Sookie's initial reluctance had grated. Tara was right, Sookie _owed_ Pam for many things, not the least of them being Tara's turning, whilst Jason was just irritating, albeit vaguely amusing.

In hindsight, however, his frustrations over the delay in saving Pam had given him an extra edge in his attack on the Authority guards. Especially since, after everything, he was not the one down in the cells setting Pam free.

Then, finally, it happened: they were in the same room again.

Even though he barely glanced at her, he didn't miss the way she straightened as he entered the room, her eyes sparkling with something akin to joy at the sight of him. And he certainly didn't miss the way her gaze followed his every move.

Despite their surroundings, the touch of her hand on his chest as she stepped passed him into the lift felt more intimate than anything he had experienced over the last few nights.

The simple gesture rendered him almost completely speechless; he was dimly aware that he said something to her, but he had no idea what it was.

His eyes found and held hers for a long moment as he tried to express with his eyes all that he couldn't say with his lips. Her small smile in response was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen.

The moment was broken when she realised he wasn't going to be joining them, but he silenced her protests with a look.

She still wasn't happy, but she made no further comment.

Eric held her gaze, dimly aware of Sookie speaking to Jason, until the doors closed. Now that he was certain of her safety, he felt equal to the task ahead.

Minutes later, however, Eric's certainly disappeared in the blink of an eye as Bill began to reform from the pool of blood.

Eric could only pray to whatever deity would listen that they would all make it out alive as he and Sookie fled from the room.

...

**A/N: I hope you have enjoyed my additions to Season 5, I hope to write something longer soon :) Suggestions/reviews would be appreciated x**


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